(15) PD-2020, Covid-19 and triggers

(August Silence. We have moved permanently to retire in KZN and as our Gauteng house is for sale we needed to do a final clearance. So, we drove back to Gauteng in the middle of a warm August spell so the days were pleasant. I've recovered from the drive so now I can continue with the Parkinson's Disease saga. Also, since 07 September,  I have resumed my weekly laser therapy.) 

PD and Covid-19

The impact of the Covid-19 epidemic in South Africa and lockdown resulted in a tense time for the aged, especially those with co-morbidities. For the past five years my wife and I have avoided taking an annual flu vaccine, in an attempt to bolster our immune systems. However, this year, hype and unpredictability around the nature of coronavirus led to our taking both the flu and the pneumonia vaccines. That was my primary reason for taking the vaccines and, so far, so good.

Besides my age, another reason for considering these two vaccines is my preoccupation with triggers and PD. These triggers exist in both my "muscle memory" as well as my "muscle forgetory" (see earlier post) and lead to reactions that I have to counter or minimise. Triggers often lead to a physical manifestation resulting in tremors, leaden limbs, anxiety setting off excessive perspiration or even shortness of breath, the latter being a manifestation I have noted for the past ten years. So, recent bouts of shortness of breath (specifically during the past two months) have made me wonder if I had picked up the virus. But then I had to remind myself of similar instances of 'shortness of breath' predating the epidemic...

Rooted or booted

The picture below was taken in 2019 in Riebeek Kasteel, Western Cape. The tree's visible roots are vital to the tree's existence and are not superficial, like warts that are often just excess skin that may be removed. I have shared this picture to illustrate the presence of Parkinson's Disease (PD). If I am the tree, then my PD is similar to this tree's root systems. It has invisible, underground roots that have infiltrated and now commandeer the engine room of my nerve and muscle infrastructure. It also has roots above ground that represent visible manifestations, such as my tremors, leaden limbs and awkward gait.

I will attempt to sustain this analogy rather than leaf it alone 😏. My triggers exist within the equivalent of the tree's original, underground root system and, therefore, exist in my memory as past trauma or unpleasantness. Allow me to unpack this. Whenever it is cold I shiver but the shivers become tremors which I have referred to as "trevers" in an earlier post. Nowadays, when it is a little cool in an air-conditioned  mall and I am away from my house without a jersey, then I respond by believing it's going to get colder. Partial discomfort and low stress is triggered. I have to remind myself that I am okay, that all is well and that I do not need the jersey.

Another example of a trigger indoors is having my walking path blocked by dark coloured objects, such as a pile of socks or plastic bags on the floor. I have the uncomfortable feeling that such objects - although insignificant in size - are going to make me trip and fall. These are insignificant images in my peripheral vision but prompt low levels of irritation that develop anxiety in me. The triggers are becoming more prominent in my daily life as is my constant reflection. 

The laser treatment that I have been undergoing since May 2020 is an attempt to energise my body's internal communication system and remind it of my pre-dopamine depletion period. That would be the equivalent of kickstarting processes driven by the tree's original, underground root system before creating the need for the aboveground roots. 

Whither laser therapy

In order to reinforce the therapy and to reverse my "new normal" described earlier, I have had to to constantly speak to my barely existent movements so they are reminded to respond. I believe my brain has been kickstarted but because of my physical unfitness, there is a lot I have to do in order to allow body and mind to talk to each other. Based on a reminder from my brother (thanks, S!), I have started online Tai Chi again. The dialogue absent between body and mind during the dark days of PD and pre-laser therapy, needs to be regenerated. 

An example of such regeneration would be the "corrective messaging" described in an earlier post. When walking, I would have to remind my right heel to move before my toes so that my right foot stops dragging on the floor. The silent reminder, if you remember, would be "right-heel two-three toe-two-three, left-heel two-three toe-two-three".

I have just completed my 17th session of laser therapy and there are growing glimmers of hope. It's up to me to fight the good fight...till next time. 

 

   

Covid19 safety and vaccines

Will power and "ME" (Ari vs Intruder)